HGT Funnies

HG asked me, “What are you huffing and puffing about over there?”

HG heard Selena Gomez’s song lyric about a boy being drunk and all alone. {sarcastically} “Gosh, sounds like a GREAT guy to date. No wonder he’s alone!”

HG tested positive for strep this summer. Over HG’s head while she played on my phone, Dr. Carver asked if she wanted medicine or a shot. HG piped up, “Isn’t that obvious?!”

I dropped something on the kitchen floor, and HG told me, “I can’t take you anywhere!”

“Babies are so cute and so fun, but you can never make them mind!”

“We’re on Poplar. Of course, traffic is awful!”

As HG’s ice cream dripped, she said, “I was born in the country. I’m ok!”

When I commented on how polite she was being with her good manners, she said, “Don’t ruin the moment, Mama.”

HG to Cressey: “Life is hard. You don’t always get what you want. I want a pony and a dog!”

HG dressed me for the Bruno Mars concert (after putting on my makeup). As she picked out my jewelry, “You HAVE to wear your wedding ring. There will be LOTS of cute boys there, and you know they might want to marry you.”

Both girls were jockeying for room in my lap, and I called Cressey ‘Helen Grace.’ HG was like, “You can’t even keep your own children’s names straight?!” I laughed and said, “Not always.” She sassed back, “Are you gonna put THAT in your ‘book report’?!” (made those air quotes)

I showed HG a pic from a year ago that popped up on Facebook of her rocking Cressey. She said, “I’m not getting happy tears. I’m not!”

Driving to school, we noticed two police cars behind us. I joked that there was a car for each girl. HG said, “Cressey can’t go to jail. She’s way too cute for those orange jumpers.”

When she got into the car after school, I had on some new sunglasses, and the first words out of HG’s mouth were, “Mama, those are the enemy of fashion!”